It’s a statement referenced often in the mental health world: Do not quit till the miracle happens. The meaning behind it is to keep going even when things are tough. Please do not take this so literally you think it means staying in an unhealthy situation. What it does mean is that if you are taking positive actions, at times the outcome may take a while to achieve.
I have a front row seat to miracles. These vary. I sit in recovery meetings and see individuals put their lives back together. I see people become able to handle things that at one time they thought were impossible. I see organizations that at one time had poor employee engagement become Best Places to Work. I see employees who had thought of quitting decide to stay and come to feel they belong where they work, and those they work with are like family. I see communities that were once unsafe become places people want to be. I see people who were takers become givers. These miracles are there for all of us if we look, if we are forgiving, and if we are patient.
Here are some recent examples.
I viewed on social media a mom celebrating her daughter’s graduation with love everywhere. A decade ago, she was receiving supervised visitation due to addiction.
I read that Aramark Healthcare+ was named by Modern Healthcare as a Best Place to Work. This was not the case five years ago when they were losing talent and clients.
I live in Pensacola, Florida. In the past twenty years, my community has worked hard to become the thirty-first best city in America, the fourth safest place, the eighteenth best community to start a business in, and to have a street (Palafox) be named one of the ten best downtown streets in the country. Twenty years ago, if someone had said that Pensacola would be recognized for the above accomplishments, they would have been identified by many as delusional. (In fact, I was.)
While we all wish it could happen faster, I read about tremendous progress in helping people live longer and better lives. There are people alive today who five years ago would not have been, but improved treatment options made it possible.
Yes, I am still a bit delusional. I am an optimist. Why? Because I get to see these positive occurrences.
A few tips, some of which you may have heard before:
- Think and say get to, not got to. Today, when I speak, I start with, “My goal today is to have people leave being ‘get to’ people and to create a ‘get to’ culture.” And it turns out this is what attendees list as the number-one takeaway from my presentations. Listen to yourself and others. Do you say and hear the words got to,have to, and must more than get to? These phrases create a sense of dread and feed into feeling sorry for oneself. Say get to. It rewires one’s thinking.
- Focus on gratitude. I hear people say, “If I hear one more time to create a gratitude list, I am going to throw up!”Then they start one. And guess what? They begin to tell others to start a gratitude list. A few months back, I was fortunate to be with Charles Gressle and the team of leaders at HCA East Florida. One of the suggested assignments for the next week was to write down each day three things we are grateful for. One of the attendees sent me their three items, and I responded with my three items. We have not missed a day in two months. My life is enriched.
- Do something good for someone and do not tell anyone about it. I was given this assignment years ago. I asked the person who suggested it, “Can I at least tell you?” The answer was no. Your “something good” does not have to be earth shattering. It may be picking up trash or letting someone in who is trying to pull into traffic. As the New Radicals sing, you get what you give.
- Forgive. I believe that to have serenity, a person will reach a place of forgiveness or acceptance. The question is how much pain we endure before we get there.
- Keep moving forward. Do the next right thing and…
…Do not quit till the miracle happens.
